When I first ventured into business meetings (long time ago) I used to sit quietly in awe at some of the extraordinary language I heard from a few obviously brilliant people, and even though I often hadn't the faintest idea what they were saying, it sounded great!

Of course, as you become more experienced, you start to realize that perhaps they sometimes haven't a clue themselves what they're jabbering on about and their main objective is to sell themselves , big themselves up, talk a good game and generally be admired by everyone (just as I once did!)

This all came to a head a few years ago.

I was in a meeting in London with a roomful of people I didn't know (apart from the Managing Director of this advertising agency) and there were 7 or 8 people all talking this mysterious language (that we will call 'meetspeak') to two rather perplexed but greatly impressed clients.

After about 20 minutes, I discretely passed a little note to my MD chum saying "what the **** does ******* mean?".

He calmly scribbled a note and passed it back saying "**** knows!"

Then later that day, over lunch, I was introduced to the fabulous game of BULLSHIT BINGO and it now all makes sense.

It's very simple and you can easily play it on your own. Print off the sheet, pop it under the top sheet of a ruled pad and then take it with you to your next meeting.

Play no active part in the meeting. Merely nod occasionally and say "absolutely" and "I agree entirely" in all the right places and wait patiently until you hear the words and phrases on your sheet - all irritating buzzwords, annoying phrases and complex alternatives to more common words instead of stating the obvious.

You won't have to wait long and as you hear them, cross them off.

You can play for a whole line, vertically or horizontally and, as soon as you cross off a whole line, you stand up and shout "BULLSHIT!" and sit down again. (This may be followed by an embarrassing silence and it's often then a good time for you to make your excuses and leave).

Alternatively, you can have a 'rollover' and take the sheet from meeting to meeting until you eventually get the full house (and hopefully this isn't achieved when you're in a meeting with your bank manager).

Or, you can even go for a record, seeing how many you get to cross off per hour in any particular meeting - and even keep a league table of the worst clients or the most bullshit laden groups.

So here it is, my own version of BULLSHIT BINGO with 64 of my real favourites.

Go to Private Keep Out page to print off your card - and start playing today!

Enjoy! (it).